Not to be Taken Too Seriously

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I need a break from theologizing some time. Here is my creative outlet, or at least where I can share the creativity of others.

 

Passing the Prayer at Dinner

Monday, October 4th, 2010

Jonathan Acuff at Stuff Christians Like graciously published a guest post I submitted. If you are visiting from SCL, welcome!

In the past, Jon has talked about prayer shot blocks, that awkward moment where someone prays the opposite of what you are praying for. Example: Someone prays God will bless a bad dating relationship they are in and their friend prays right after instead that “God would give my friend patience and clarity about her relationship.”

But there’s a different type of prayer shot block that needs to be discussed. I’m talking about people who refuse to pray in public when you go out to dinner as a group. Whether they politely decline or flat out shot block your request that they pray, they make it crystal clear that they won’t be doing that. It’s the prayer equivalent of switching seats on an airplane because you can’t handle the “responsibility” of being in the emergency row.

There are six common ways people get out of praying at dinner:

continue reading…


Lesson of the four leaf clover

Friday, May 28th, 2010

With Trinity Sunday coming up, I was out in the yard picking clovers to use as a children’s message. And then I found this…

From the reverse you can clearly see the four stems for each leaf.

So this means either God hates the clover analogy or he wants me to preach on the Wesleyan Quadrilateral this Sunday.

What do you make of this sign?


FEMA knows the 2nd Coming is near!

Tuesday, December 15th, 2009

raptureThis year FEMA, the Federal Emergency Management Agency, has put together a Christmas list to take some stress out of your holiday season: (from their website)

  • Disaster kits for homes, offices and autos (first aid kits; food, water and prescription medications for 72 hours; i.e., extra clothing, blankets, and flashlights).
  • NOAA weather radios with extra batteries.
  • Enrollment in a CPR or first-aid class.
  • Smoke detectors.
  • Fire extinguishers (for kitchen, garage, car, etc.)
  • Foldable ladders for second-story escape in a fire.
  • Car kits (emergency flares, shovels, ice scrapers, flashlights and fluorescent distress flags).
  • Pet Disaster kits (food, water, leashes, dishes and carrying case or crate).
  • Battery powered lamps

“Disasters can happen anytime, anywhere and the holiday season provides a great opportunity to ensure that you and your loved ones are taking simple steps to be prepared,” said FEMA Administrator Craig Fugate.

I’m not sure if FEMA is telling us the whole story. Do they know something we don’t know? Get disaster kits to be prepared for Christmas? …..

FEMA must know that Christ is coming back for Christmas this year!

Good thing there are 10 more shopping days until the Apocalypse.


Uplifting Story on Christian Radio

Monday, October 26th, 2009

I heard this “uplifting” story on my local Christian radio station. Its only about a minute and certainly worth a listen.

[wpaudio url="http://www.womentoday.org/mp3/102109.mp3" text="small world"]

Viki’s husband dies and the pastor’s wife comes and gives comfort to Viki. Years later, the pastor is shot and killed while he was preaching in the pulpit! So Viki comes and comforts the pastor’s wife who supported her when her husband died. Isn’t that swell and uplifting?

So I guess the moral of this story is – if you support someone who’s husband died your husband will die too; but its okay because at least you’ve got each other.

And if you know of any of these other bible-minute audio programs, please do share!


Let’s Burn Bibles for Halloween (well…except the KJV)

Sunday, October 18th, 2009

Proof that ignorance is destructive. A church in North Carolina is planning to hold a book burning this Halloween – including Bibles. The pastor says that only the King James Version contains the true word of God and all others must be destroyed!

What is this even based on? Do these people realized that KJV isn’t even the first English Bible? Let’s not forget that Wycliff and Tyndale both created English translations before KJV; both martyred for it!

But then again, Jesus and the Disciples obviously used KJV… 1,611 years before it was even made. Now that is divine providence.


Lynchburg is God’s Country

Thursday, June 4th, 2009

Beside the great number of churches, Jerry Falwell’s Liberty University along with a Disciples college, there is now one more reason why Lynchburg is God’s country.

A man claiming to be God delayed a US Airways flight in Lynchburg, VA.

I wonder if Lynchburg gets a strike against it though, because “god” was flying outta there.

Did I mention I am seeking a church to serve in Lynchburg?


Television Characters who are Seminary Drop-Outs

Monday, May 25th, 2009

I am in my last quarter of seminary and the end is in sight. However, these guys are tempting me…

chaseDr. Robert Chase on House

Dropped out of seminary in order to become a doctor. He is pretty successful, working for one of the greatest diagnosticians of all time, Dr. Gregory House. Chase is known for showing up to work hung over, and gets in big trouble when a bad diagnosis results in the death of a patient. He shares the fact that he was in seminary in season 1, episode 5. See house MD guide for some more background.



Toby Flenderson on The Office

In season 5, episode 24 “Casual Friday,” we learn that Toby in HR dropped out of seminary.

“Well, I was in the seminary for a year and dropped out because I wanted to have sex with this girl, Cathy. Followed her back to Scranton. Took the first job I could find in HR. Later she divorced me. So, no, I wouldn’t say I have a passion for HR.”

I just want to give Toby a hug. [thanks tv.com for the quote]

milliebanksMillie Banks on My Name is Earl

Season 2, episode 6 “Made a Lady Think I Was God.” Millie banks is the meanest trailer park manager ever. Earl uses a walkie talkie to convince her that God is talking to her through a hearing aide. After taking all her gold and silver she becomes a nun. When Millie finds out she was duped she leaves the convent, returns to the trailer park and is meaner than before. After Earl fixes everything (with Jesus in a grilled cheese sandwich), Millie finally returns to the convent.

Desmond on LOST

Season 3, episode 17 reveals that Desmond was in training to be a monk. However, after getting sauced on that sweet monastery wine, he is kicked out. See you in another life brother!


mreckoMr. Ecko on LOST

…well this is kinda reverse. He never went to seminary but went with the philosophy “fake it till you make it” and pretended to be a priest in order to avenge his brother’s death (who was a priest). But don’t say that to his face or you’ll probably get whacked in the face with his Jesus stick.



So what could be in store for me, should I drop out now? Doctor, Director of human resources, trailer park manager, or a gorgeous deserted isle cast-away?